Equality?

So i saw this post earlier that a colleague of mine shared on a messaging platform that basically said feminism is toxic, and i quote “murders children, is a mental issue, makes wives leave their husbands” etc.

This is a 20-something-year-old man posting these type of toxic shits on social media.

Feminism and ‘equality’ is such a taboo thing in Indonesia that so little people even bothered to educate themselves on it. I remember once in my first year of college a professor asked us about whether we think men and women are equal,

AND DUDE I WAS SO READY TO GET IN THERE AND CHECK-LIST ALL THE THINGS I WANTED TO EDUCATE IN THAT CLASS.

But unfortunately he then directed the question pointedly to this one female student and she basically said that no she doesn’t believe that we are created equal because God created men to be more capable of blablabla kiss my fucking ass man.

To say i was fuming was an understatement.

Like how dare you make such a stupid argument and correlate it to some sort of bullshit religious point of view.

And about ‘wives leaving their husbands’? Is it such a bad thing that women could finally grow a backbone and stand-up in their marriage to leave their toxic husbands? I mean do you even know how high the rate of domestic abuse in Indonesia is? In 2016 alone there are 245.548 cases of reported domestic abuse, that’s 94% of the reported crime cases in Indonesia. Some women are literally left for dead because they wouldn’t allow their husband marry a second wive. But of course no one really take a look much into it because it’s just part of the Indonesian ‘culture’.

And what about women who leave their husband to not just protect themselves, but also their children from their abusive fathers? Either physically or mentally, no one, especially a child deserves that.

How about men who wanted to leave their wives because of the said abuse? People would barely take cases of abuse on women seriously, how would they even react to men’s? They would look way less into that. Abuse can go either way.

And comparing feminism to a mental disability, to a condition where the people affected actually need help in the risk of their own life? Really?

See, this kind of thinking, of how ‘feminism is toxic’ is the exact reason why we need feminism. It’s not toxic, it’s merely wanting equality for everyone. The fact that even just the word ‘feminism’ is seen as an offensive thing in our culture is so heartbreaking.

I remember i used to feel offended when people call me a feminist because of the way i see things. At the time, i wasn’t really familiar with the term yet and haven’t really educated myself on it, and seeing it as a mock.

But now, i am striving to be just that. I don’t dare call myself a feminist yet, because i don’t feel like i’ve done enough or contributed in a large scale on the issues feminist activists around the world fight for. I merely only do what i can, sharing as much as i can on the issue through social media and be as careful as i can while doing so, because of the strain in our culture. (Don’t even get me started on LGBTQ-phobia, that’s for another post/rant).

I don’t dare call myself a feminist yet, but i want to be and i am striving to be deserving of that title.

This is frustrating.

 

-xxx

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